French’s International Copyrighted (in England, her Colonies, and 
the United States) Edition of the Works of the Best Authors 


No. 352 


MISS MARIA 

A COMEDY IN ONE ACT 


FROM OLD CHESTER TALES BY MARGARET DELAND 


DRAMATIZED BY MAUDE B. VOSBURGH 


Copyright, 1917, By Samuel French 


ALL RIGHTS RESERVED 


PRICE 25 CENTS 


New York 
SAMUEL FRENCH 

PUBLISHER 

28-30 WEST 38th Street 


London 

SAMUEL FRENCH, Ltd. 
26 Southampton Street 
STRAND 


090909909 










MISS MARIA 


A COMEDY IN ONE ACT 


FROM OLD CHESTER TALES BY MARGARET DELAND 


DRAMATIZED BY MAUDE B. VOSBURGH 


Copyright, 1917, By Samuel French 


ALL RIGHTS RESERVED 


New York 


> 

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•> j> 

* •> > 


SAMUEL FRENCH 


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PUBLISHER 

28-30 West 38th STREET 


London 


SAMUEL FRENCH, Ltd. 
26 Southampton Street 
STRAND 





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• • 


48380 


NOV 21 1817 







MISS MARIA 


COMEDY IN ONE ACT 

From Old Chester Tales by Margaret Deland 
Dramatized by Maude B. V os burgh 


PERSONS 

Miss Maria Welwood A middle-aged gentle - 
woman, erect, bright-eyed, and rosy-cheeked , 
with a sweet voice and a refined manner 
Miss Rose Twenty-five years old, pretty, impul¬ 
sive, and fun-loving 

Mr. Charles Welwood A supercilious young man 
about thirty, tall and prim, with a nervous move¬ 
ment to his fingers 

Mrs. Matilda Barkley About fifty, stout and un¬ 
shapely, blunt in manner and plain in appearance 
Mr Ezra Barkley. A placid bachelor of fifty, 
portly, and of middle-height, excessively polite 
in manner and ponderous in conversation _ 

Mr. Charles Welwood’s four small children 

The action passes in Old Chester, in Miss Maria 
"Welwood’s sitting-room, about i860. 

3 



MISS MARIA 


COSTUMES 

Mtss Maria. Gray cashmere, simply made, with 
white lace at her neck and wrists. Dainty muslin 
apron. 

Miss Rose. Pink challie with a floral design. 
Broad-brimmed hat with ribbons hanging; short, 
loose sacqfle. Both of these gowns should be quaint 
and picturesque. 

Mrs. Barkley. Stiff, black silk, voluminous 
skirt, tightly buttoned basque with flowing sleeves; 
small black bonnet trimmed grotesquely with white 
daisies ; spectacles ; small parasol; a mother-of-pearl 
card case; Congress shoes, and white stockings. 

Mr. Barkley. Formal afternoon dress of the 
period ; silk hat; eye glasses ; fob ; gold-headed cane. 

Mr. Charles Welwood. Fashionable, new busi¬ 
ness suit of the time. 

4 



MISS MARIA 


Scene: A door at r. opens outside. A door opens 
to an entry at l. Windows are at the hack 
showing a garden. Before the windows stands 
a table holding tumblers of jelly. Up R. is a 
secretary or chest of drawers with candles and 
tip-mirror. Up l . is a fireplace, chair, and 
foot-stool, r. of center are arm-chairs on cither 
side of a table. 

Curtain rises on empty stage. Old-fashioned 
door bell jingles at r. Rose enters l. door 
zvhich is open, hastily removing a big gingham 
apron which she rolls into a ball and tosses be¬ 
hind secretary as she approaches r. door . 

Rose. (Opening r. door) A telegram for Miss 
Maria? All right, thank you. (Shuts door and calls 
as she starts to cross) Cousin Maria. 

Miss Maria. (Answering off l.) I am coming. 
(Enters, l., trying on dainty apron) 

Rose. (Center, passing telegram) A telegram 
for you, clear. 

Miss Maria. (Opening telegram) I hope it isn’t 
bad news about Charles’s wife or the new baby. 
Let’s see, yes —(Reading with Rose leaning over her 
shoulder) “ Wife needs quiet.” Poor thing. “Will 
bring children for visit this afternoon.” Isn’t that 
delightful! 

Rose. (Going up for apron, smiling) It’s best 
to take unavoidable visitations in that spirit. 

Maria. (Studying telegram) “ This afternoon.” 
They’ll be here soon then. 

5 



6 


MISS MARIA 


Rose. The telegram was delayed. ( Resignedly 
shaking the wrinkles out of her apron and folding 
it up neatly) And I guess our supper will be too, 
with five extra to feed. 

Maria. ( Poking the fire) Fortunately Jane put 
up plenty of pear preserve before she left us. The 
children will get enough. 

Rose. Charles acts as if your house were a 
regular charity home for children. He gets such a 
good salary, why doesn’t he pay their board? 

Maria. ( Coming down to the table) The idea! 
Ever since I received the poor little orphan as my 
brother’s legacy, I have treated him like my own 
son. 1 f I am only a great-aunt to the children, I 
can try to fill the place of a grandma. 

Rose. (Speaking softly and petting Maria) 
You have been a mother to me too ever since I can 
remember. ( She sits l. near the table to rip apart 
the breadths of an old woolen skirt) I don’t mean 
to find fault with your arrangements. 

- Maria. (Smoothing Rose’s hair) Oh, I didn’t 
think that my dear! (She becomes absorbed in the 
telegram) See, just ten words! Charles is so 
businesslike, never wastes a word! 

Rose. (With a little sigh) If he could only turn 
the words he saves into dollars! 

Maria. (Passing her hand carressingly over 
Rose’s shoulder) I wish 1 could get you a new 
gown for this winter, Rose. It troubles me to see 
you make that old one over again. 

Rose. (Smiling adoringly up at her) If you can 
wear your old one dear, I can wear mine. 

Maria. (Going up) They ought to be here 
now. (Standing at windows and looking l.) I see 
something tall and white. Yes, that’s Charles with 
Eddie in his arms. Isn’t he a good father to carry 
that heavy boy! See, Rose, here they come ! The 
three children are walking as fast as their father, 


MISS MARIA 


/ 


bless their little hearts! Here they are, Rose S 
(Waves her apron by the lower hem) Come and 
look at them. 

(Rose, with a gesture of impatience, puts down her 
work, and joins Maria at c. back. Rose waves 
her hand and throws a kiss. Miss Maria hur¬ 
ries off l. zvith great animation, exclaiming.) 

Maria. I’ll let them in the back door and take 
them right up-stairs. (Children’s voices off l.) 
Hello! How d’y do, Auntie. Auntie, have you got 
a kitten? (Miss Maria outside) You precious 
children ! How do you do ! I’m so glad to see you. 
Go right up-stairs. 

(Rose picks up her work and sits r. of table and 
rips vehemently. The voices recede. Then 
Charles appears at l. door and speaks back 
as he closes it.) 

Charles. Good-afternoon, Rose. (Leans walk¬ 
ing-stick near door) 

Rose. (Without rising) How do you do, 
Charles. 

Charles. (Puts hat and gloves on table, and then 
walks aimlessly about the room) Pretty well, thank 
you. 

Rose. (Eyeing him critically) You look well. 
That new suit- 

Charles. Aunt Maria brought us up to dress 
nicely. 

Rose. It’s quite becoming. Where did you get 
it? 

Charles. (Arranging necktie before mirror on 
secretary. Testily) I don’t know how it concerns 
you; it’s bought and paid for. You don’t suppose 
I stole it? 



8 


MISS MARIA 


Rose. Oh, dear, no! You wouldn’t steal so 
much as a bird’s egg. You were always such a 
good little boy! 

(Miss Maria enters l. carrying an empty wood- 
basket. She starts to fin it from the basket be¬ 
side the fireplace. Charles takes it from her 
with reluctance, and puts in three logs which he 
handles -with the tips of his fingers; he then 
draws a clean handkerchief from his pocket and 
dusts off his hands fastidiously.) 

Maria. The children are all around the big stove 
in my room getting nice and warm. (Center ) How 
is the baby? What’s her name? 

Charles. We have decided to name her Maria, 
for you. 

Maria. (Touched) My dear Charles ! ( Look¬ 

ing to Rose for sympathetic com prehension) I only 
hope I shall prove worthy of the honor. 

Charles. (Crosses to mirror to brush off his 
coat) I knew you would be pleased, so I thought 
I would announce it to you in person. 

Rose. I hope that you also bring good news from 
the Oil-Can Company. 

(Miss Marta listens eagerly for his reply.) 

Charles, (l. of Rose, behind table. Snubbing 
Rose) No news is good news, Auntie. 

Rose. (Rising. Persisting) But considering 
that Cousin Maria has invested nearly all her money 
in it, Charles, I think you should keep her informed. 

Charles. (Continuing to ignore Rose) Of 
course the enterprise is still in its infancy, but don’t 
worry a bit about the outcome of the investment. 
(Going dozen to l.) I give all my time to it, and 
watch over your interest as if it were my own. 





MISS MARIA 


9 


Maria. (Coming dozvn to chair l. of table and 
sitting. Rose sits also) I have perfect confidence 
in your judgment. 

(Charles crosses to Miss Maria and drazvs a note¬ 
book and pencil from his z'est-pocket and figures 
in it for Miss Maria’s benefit. He holds it so 
high . hozvever, that only by stretching her neck 
and straining her eyes can she see his writing.) 

Charles. (Leaning over her chair) The rural 
population of the United States is so many. We’ll 
allow seven souls to a family. No, we might as 
well make a conservative estimate and allow ten; 
it’s easier to divide by ten. 

Maria. Excuse me, Charles, but there are some 
families where there are only two, like Rose and me; 
still I suppose it is better to be on the safe side. 

Charles. Certainly. (Straightens up) Now 
then, dividing the rural population by ten, that 
makes so many families that must depend on oil 
for artificial light. (Miss Maria acquiesces gravely 
throughout his explanation) Therefore, each family 
must have an oil can, and ours is the best ever in¬ 
vented. You can see for yourself that with a few 
cents’ profit on each one, the net receipts will be 
enormous. 

Marta. (Rising) You always explain things so 
clearly. (Goes up to f re place) I wish I had a 
better head for business. 

Charles. ( Condescendingly , as he pockets his 
note-book) As there is a man in the family, it 
doesn’t matter. I’m expecting a letter to-day from 
the Secretary of the Company with the latest news 
of the law suit. 

Rose. A. law suit? 

Charles. (Airily) There are usually legal con¬ 
tests before one of these new inventions can clear 


JO MISS MARIA 

the industrial field. Business men think nothing of 
them. 

(Miss Maria lifts the zvood-baskct. Charles 
merely makes a polite pretence.) 


Charles. Allow me. 

Maria. No, I’ll take it up. I’m going to get my 
paint-box to amuse the children. (At door ) Rose 
will look after you. (Maria goes out l. Rose 
glances keenly at Charles as she resumes her 
ripping) 

Rose. I guess you can manage to look after your¬ 
self all right. I wish I could make such a good 
appearance. 

Charles. (Observing the skirt) Isn’t that going 
to be presentable? 

Rose. Yes, but I do need a new coat. (Short 
pause) Why don’t you look after me, Charles, for 
a change ? Lend me twenty-five dollars, won’t you ? 
You get such a good salary. (She watches him 
intently) 

Charles. (Standing at the fire warming his 
hands) I should be glad to oblige you, Rose, but 
mv income is not what it was. 

Rose. I thought you received so much a month. 

Charles. That was a temporary arrangement 
while I was placing the stock for the Company. 
After the shares were all sold, I was to have a 
permanent position in the factory. 

Rose. I suppose they’re sold by this time. ( Stop¬ 
ping her work) You say Cousin Maria has a con¬ 
trolling voice in the affairs of the Company. I’m 
sure she has stock enough. (Rising suddenly) 
Look here, Charles, do you mean (Walking up) you 
received a commission on every share of stock you 
have sold ? 

Charles. (Turns toward her, startled) What? 



MISS MARIA 


11 

Oh, of course the expense of organization is paid 
from the proceeds of the sale of stock. 

Rose. Then out of every twenty dollars you got 
from her, you pocketed two or three, I suppose. 
(Goes down) No wonder the Company found 
your services of value! 

Charles. ( Turning again to fire) You don’t 
understand such things, Rose. If you had any head 
for business, I’d explain. 

Rose. ( Goes up) I don’t understand such 
crooked methods, I admit. ( Goes down) If I did, 
I should have seen through them long ago. ( Throws 
down her scissors and dress) 

Charles. (Facing her with cold formality as she 
approaches him) The money, as stated in the cir¬ 
cular, goes toward obtaining valuable patent rights 
and the manufacture of the oil cans. The factory— 

Rose. (Indicating the chimney by a gesture. 
Up R.) Four brick walls as empty as this chimney! 

Charles. ( Angrily) You see it’s no use trying 
to explain matters. 

Rose. (Turning her back to him and moving 
down) Oh! I get all out of patience with you! 
I can’t pin you down to anything. 

Charles. (Following her down, with a cross 
expression but a conciliatory tone) You always get 
out of humor when I try to talk sensibly with you. 
You don’t stop to consider Aunt Maria’s interests. 
(Takes hat and gloves from table) Here I am now, 
tired out, yet I’m going down to the post office to 
see if there are any letters with good news. (Slides 
out r.., leaving the door open) 

Rose. (Turning and seeing he is gone, calls after 
him, speaking louder and louder) You might at 
least shut the door, Charles. The little coal we have 
left won’t warm up all outdoors. 

Charles. (Returns to door, and speaks severely) 
I regret I left the door open. The children are not 


12 


MISS MARIA 


accustomed to hearing such angry tones. I must 
request you, Rose, to control your temper in their 
presence. (Goes out, closing the door softly) 

(Rose gives a gasp of impatience, seizes the tip- 
mirror from the secretary, and thumps it down 
on the floor l. center by the table. Her expres¬ 
sion shows that she is trying to master her 
anger, as she stands c. and holds breadths of 
old gowm up to her figure to judge of their 
length from her reflection in the mirror. Mean¬ 
time Mrs. Barkley and Mr. Ezra Barkley 
pass behind the wall and approach the door from 
r. Mrs. Barkley lifts her full skirts high 
enough to display a bit of white stocking, and 
manages with difficulty a small parasol and a 
card case. Mr. Ezra bears aloft in both hands, 
with concern, a large plate covered with a nap¬ 
kin. His gold-headed cane hangs by the crook 
from one "wrist. Mrs. Barkley spies Rose 
through the glass doors and midges Ezra to 
look. He keeps his gaze steadily fixed on the 
pie. Rose, hearing the jingle bell, attempts to 
conceal her sewing by bunching it up on the 
secretary as she goes to open the door.) 

Rose. Why, how d’y do, Mrs. Barkley! 

Mrs. Barkley. (Entering r. door) You needn’t 
tuck your sewing away, Rose; it’s nothing to be 
ashamed of. (Up r. She examines it during the 
following) 

Rose. (Pushing a chair toward Ezra) Good- 
afternoon ; won’t you take a chair, Mr. Ezra ? 

Mr. Ezra. (Stepping in toward r. behind table) 
We are quite dependent upon chairs. Did you know, 
Miss Rose, that chairs were used in Egypt in 3300 
B. C. ? 

Rose. Won’t you sit down, Mrs. Barkley? 


MISS MARIA 


13 


Mrs. Barkley. (Nodding her head in approba¬ 
tion as she lays down Rose’s work) You ought to 
be proud that you can make over your clothes, 
though it’s a shame you have to pinch this way. I 
wish Charles had more of your ability. It’s men like 
Charles that marry, though. There’s Ezra. (Ezra 
still stands placidly, holding the pie) Put the mince- 
pie on the table, Ezra! (Ezra obeys) He would 
make a model husband, just like his brother. No 
widow ever had more cause to mourn than I! 
(Shakes her head dejectedly and turns to look at 
the jelly whcih she holds up against the light. Ezra. 
walking sedately around the table, stumbles over the 
mirror, without being disconcerted, however, and 
places it on the center table. Rose, r. of table, lifts 
lip a corner of the napkin to admire the pie) 

Rose. There’s one thing I don’t believe you know, 
Mr. Ezra; how many raisins there are in that pie! 

Ezra. (l. of table, bowing politely) I could 
only hazard a conjecture. Have you any idea of the 
computed number of eggs in a shad-roe? 

Rose. Oh, I dare say there are four or five hun¬ 
dred. 

Ezra. Allow me to inform you that there are one 
hundred thousand. Naturally, it Varies; that is 
only the approximate number. 

Rose. Dear me, it’s quite serious to think of eat¬ 
ing so many little fish at a time. 

Mrs. Barkley. Jane’s jelly looks fine. 

Rose. I put that up. 

Mrs. Barkley. Why didn’t Jane do it? 

Rose. Jane left yesterday. 

Mrs. Barkley. Not discharged? 

Rose. Yes. 

Mrs. Barkley. What! After seventeen years 
of service in this house? 

Rose. ( Crossing to l.) Yes; it can’t be helped. 

Mrs. Barkley. (Coming forward excitedly with 


I 4 


MISS MARIA 


glass of jelly in her hand ) I suppose all this fright¬ 
ful economy is due to that thief Charles. 

Rose. (Laughing to herself) Oh! I wish that 
door zi'ere open. 

Mrs. Barkley. ( Continuing, standing with Rose 
on one side l. and Ezra on the other r.) Maria 
has always been a fool over that selfish boy. 

Ezra. (Trying to stop her) My dear Matilda! 

Mrs. Barkley. Well, Ezra, everybody knows 
that Rose has always been a help to Maria and 
Charles a hindrance. 

Ezra. Only a mythological hero would under¬ 
take the quest of discovering anyone surpassing Miss 
Rose in character and accomplishments. 

(Rose is zvatching l. door much amused. Rose 

makes a curtsey.) 

Mrs. Barkley. You hear, Rose, what Ezra says? 

Rose. (Demurely) And if Charles hears it- 

Mrs. Barkley. (Grabbing Rose’s right hand and 
forgetting to hold the jelly glass upright, which is 
in her right hand) You don’t mean that Charles is 
here ?' 

Rose. (Responding with a nod) And the chil¬ 
dren. 

Mrs. Barkley. I think it’s a perfect imposition. 
This is the seventh visit he has made since he was 
married. 

Ezra. My dear Matilda! If Miss Maria hears! 
(Charles opens l. door and and puts his head in.) 

Mrs. Barkley. I’d like to know how that 
Universal Oil-Can is getting on. 

Ezra. I trust it will hold out like the Widow’s 
Cruse. 



MISS MARIA 15 

(Charles feels for walking-stick.) 

Mrs. Barkley. I shouldn’t be surprised if Maria 
didn’t get a cent out of it, the pious rascal! ( The 
stick drops zvitli a clatter, Charles slams the door 
and they turn guiltily. Ezra looks horrified; Rose, 
mischievous; Mrs. Barkley raises her hands and 
lets them fall on her knees as she drops into a chair) 

Ezra. I apprehend he has paid the forfeit of 
listeners. 

Rose. (Rescues the glass of jelly with which 
Mrs. Barkley has been gesticulating violently dur¬ 
ing her tirade against Charles) He shouldn’t have 
been round when he wasn’t wanted. 

Mrs. Barkley. Oh, he has always been in the 
way. Spoilt Maria’s chances of marrying long ago. 

Rose. (Rose on her way up with jelly whirls 
round, center. In her surprise also forgets the jelly) 
Why, did Cousin Maria ever care for anyone? 

Mrs. Barkley. There was never anyone special. 

Ezra. (Behind table) Do not be too sure. Miss 
Maria is made of the stuff of martyrs. She may 
have cultivated concealment like- 

Mrs. Barkley. Fiddlesticks! What does an old 
bachelor know about it ? Where is she ? Amusing 
those young ones? 

Rose. (Center) Yes, I’ll go and play with them, 
and send her down. (Rose goes out l. scrutinizing 
the glass of jelly with a dubious expression) 

Ezra. (r. of table. Beginning to fidget) I must' 
be going. 

Mrs. Barkley. (Looking after Rose) Rose is a 
most superior girl. Still she does eat and she has 
to have clothes, consequently, she’s an expense to 
Maria. I wish she had a home of her own, Ezra. 

Ezra. (Stands by the fire in a reflective attitude) 
She converses somewhat rapidly. At times I find it 
difficult to- 




MISS MARIA 


16 


Mrs. Barkley. To follow her? Oh, you would 
get used to that. 

Ezra. To comprehend her. Still she is a pleas¬ 
ing young lady. (Ezra takes off his glasses and 
rubs the bridge of his nose thoughtfully ) 

Mrs. Barkley. She’s twenty-five. I call that 
just the right age for a man of fifty, and Maria has 
brought her up to have the greatest respect for you; 
{Turns toward Ezra) I’ve heard her myself tell 
Rose that your conversation is most improving. 

Ezra. (After breathing on his glasses, polishes 
them with his handkerchief, and holds them up to 
see if they are clear) Were you aware, Matilda, 
that glass was discovered by the accident of- 

Mrs. Barkley. No, I wasn’t! Maria looks all 
worn out. Of course she wouldn’t take our money, 
though she thinks it perfectly right for that rogue 
Charles to take hers. I declare, I don’t know where 
it’s all going to end. 

Ezra. The end sanctifies the means. “ Finis 
coronat opus.” 

Mrs. Barkley. ( Breaking in) To go back to 
Rose, Ezra; to be perfectly open; if you are think¬ 
ing of settling, I must say that Rose is one girl in a 
thousand. I don’t want to influence you, but I must 
say that. 

(Miss Maria enters l., stops suddenly on seeing 
Ezra, and comes down beaming with delight. 
Mrs. Barkley rises to greet her. They shake 
both hands.) 

Maria. Why, Mr. Ezra ! I didn’t know you were 
here! 

Ezra. (Bows bashfully and goes dozen to table) 
I trust you don’t consider it an intrusion. 

Maria. It is a compliment to receive a call from 
a gentleman in the afternoon. 

Ezra. (Uncovers the pie and folds up the nap- 




MISS MARIA 


17 

kin) I am charmed to be of service. A lady must 
be mistress of unusual dexterity to manage simulta¬ 
neously her apparel and a pie. 

Maria. (At tabic, admiring pie) I’m sure I’m 
most indebted to you, Mr. Ezra. You are not going? 
I hope you will come again soon. 

Ezra. ( His diffidence culminating) Ah, yes! 
Quite so, thank you. Good-afternoon. (He bozvs 
himself out r.) 

Mrs. Barkley. I made my Thanksgiving mince¬ 
meat a little earlier than usual, so I thought I’d just 
bring you a taste. (Maria starts to untie Mrs. 
Barkley’s bonnet-strings; Mrs. Barkley remon¬ 
strates) I mustn’t stop. I want to make several 
cails. 

Maria. You are always so generous, Matilda, 

vou make me feel ashamed of mvself. There is that 

■/ 

slipper-bag I promised you over a month ago. 
(Maria goes to the secretary drawer, fumbles under 
the circulars of oil-can company, scattering them 
round on the floor, and produces an embroidered 
slipper-bag which she presents to Mrs. Barkley) 
Here it is at last. I’m so sorry to have kept you 
waiting. 

Mrs. Barkley. You needn’t apologize. (Ex¬ 
amining it) I’ve lived all my life without one; I 
guess a week or two more won’t hurt me. Besides, 
I don’t wear slippers. Still, I’m obliged to you. 

(They seat themselves near the table. Maria r., 

Mrs. Barkley l.) 

Maria. To tell the truth, I’ve had a good deal 
on my mind lately. I suppose Rose told you that 
Charles is here? 

Mrs. Barkley. (Folding her hands at her waist) 
Yes, with all those children, except the last one. I 
dare say he is perfectly delighted with that? 


i8 


MISS MARIA 


Maria. ( With spirit) I should hope so! How 
can you pretend to be so heartless, Matty? Would 
you have a parent indifferent to his offspring? 

Mrs. Barkley. (Mrs. Barkley unties her bon¬ 
net strings) Indifferent! I call it something worse 
than indifferent. I don’t think a man has any right 
to have children if he can’t support them. When 
they are too much for him, he just brings them to 
you. If they were kittens, he would drown ’em. 

Maria. ( Reprovingly) My dear Matilda! 

Mrs. Barkley. There’s no use getting into a 
passion, Maria. You know I’m always perfectly 
open with you. Why aren’t you as frank with me 
about that oil-can company? You must be awfully 
worried. 

Maria. I confess I am a little disturbed; not for 
myself, you know, but for my dear young people. 

Mrs. Barkley. There! That’s just like you. 
You would live on bread yourself, as long as you 
could get bread and butter for Rose, and bread and 
butter and jam for Charles’s children. (Mrs. 
Barkley moves her chair away from table and 
points with a snort to the jelly in the window) But 
you, you poor, dear Maria, ( She sniffs again) 
you’re just a perfect fool. (She breaks out sobbing 
and wipes her eyes on the slipper-bag, exclaiming 
brokenly) For my part, I’d never waste my time 
making things like this. 


(Maria kneels at her r. side and puts her arms 
round her . They are both affected.) 

Maria. My dear Matty, what should I do with¬ 
out you! - 

Mrs. Barkley. Just come and live with me, 
Maria. I shall think it all providential if you’ll only 
come. 

Maria. My dear friend, it’s worth while to be 


MISS MARIA 


19 


poor. ( Rising and bracing up) No, my dear, you 
mustn’t urge it. If things turn out worse than I 
anticipate, I have a little plan. 

Mrs. Barkley. ( Anxiously) What is it? 

Maria. It’s going to be a surprise, but I’m sure 
it will be a good thing. ( Sitting again r. of table) 
I have decided to open an academy for young ladies. 

Mrs. Barkley. A boarding-school? 

Maria. An academy, 011 the lines of Miss 
Brace’s, where we passed so many happy hours to¬ 
gether, dear Matty. Can’t you just see Miss Brace 
with those white curls and the turban when she 
opened the classes ? My gracious, how we girls 
used to shiver when she pointed her forefinger at 
us. ( Mimics Miss Brace) I shan’t do that, any¬ 
how. 

Mrs. Barkley. Nobody would shiver if you did. 
Miss Brace was very genteel and dignified, but if 
you think, Maria Welwood, that you - 

Maria. ( Rising) Oh, of course not. But I’ve 
got my notes, and I’m going to say just the same 
things. 

Mrs. Barkley. Do you remember how she used 
to make us carry atlases on our heads? ( Rising ) 
You are so erect, I believe you could do it now. 

Maria. I’ll try. ( She pulls a large, thin book 
off the table and walks about the room, balancing it 
on her head, while Mrs. Barkley watches her with 
admiration ) Listen. These are some of her notes 
I committed to memory: “ The making of wax 
flowers is an art most suitable for young ladies; 
frost and snow may reign around us, and nip the 
tender blossoms in our gardens, but our houses may 
still be made elegant by delightful representations 
of Flora’s children.” ( Enthusiastically, as she re¬ 
moves the atlas) We began with the pomegranate 
flower. 

Mrs. Barkley. ( Morosely . r. of table glancing 




20 


MISS MARIA 


at the framed wreaths on the zvall) I don’t believe 
anyone would pay a quarter to learn how to make 
a pomegranate flower, nowadays; I’m sure I 
wouldn’t. I don’t believe you remember how, any¬ 
way. 

Maria. (Cheerfully putting back the book and 
sitting opposite Mrs. Barkley at the table. Maria 
at l.) Of course. I'll have to brush up a little. In 
arithmetic, all the answers are in the book, so I’ll 
know when the sums are right. History is the only 
thing I’m nervous about, and Rose is pretty fresh in 
that. 

Mrs. Barkley. (At r. of table) Such nonsense ! 
Suppose Rose were to get married! You couldn’t 
get along by yourself, so what’s the use of be¬ 
ginning? 

Maria. Rose get married ? Well, I don’t see any 
prospect just now. 

Mrs. Barkley. If she did, you’d go and live 
with her, so why not both of you come to my house 
till then ? 

Maria. ( Rising ) I wouldn’t think of living 
with her, no indeed. But no young gentleman is 
waiting on Rose. ( Starting to cross toward fire¬ 
place) There aren’t any young gentlemen in Old 
Chester. 

Mrs. Barkley. ( Eyeing her sidewise) Suppose 
Ezra took a fancy to Rose ? 

Maria. ( Stopping center) To — Rose? 

Mrs. Barkley. (Sharply) Yes, Rose! That’s 
what I said. 

Maria. (Falteringly) Rose. He’s twenty-five 
years older than Rose. That’s quarter of a century. 

Mrs. Barkley. Well, I only said suppose. 

Maria. Neither of them ever thought of such a 
thing. 

Mrs. Barkley, You’re not objecting to Ezra, I 
hope. He’d make her a good husband. 


MISS MARIA 


21 


Maria. (Maria stands with her back toward 
Mrs. Barkley looking over r. shoulder down-stage. 
Blankly) Why of course I don’t object to Ezra. 

Mrs. Barkley. I suppose after taking care of 
Rose for twenty years, you’re startled at the thought 
of losing her. 

Maria. (Speaks mechanically with her eyes fixed 
on vacancy) No, it wasn’t at the thought of losing 
Rose. 

Mrs. Barkley. I used to hope that you and Ezra 
might come to an understanding some day. (Miss 
Maria zvinces) He always thought very highly of 
you, and there was a time when you seemed to- 

Maria. (Returning to l. of table) I never had 
time to think of marrying. My duty has always 
been laid out for me. Even now, if I mav be the 
humble instrument in educating young women as 
we were educated, Matty, to respect their parents, 
and to honor their God, and to cross a room 
properly, if I do that I shall feel that the Lord had 
a purpose in taking away my money. 

Mrs. Barkley. The Lord! Don’t put it on the 
Lord's shoulders :—there’s no use ! Someone’s got 
to talk sense to you. I don’t believe you’d get pupils 
enough to pay for your shoe-strings. Does Rose 
like the idea of being a school-marm? 

(The four children, playing hoop, run into the 
garden from l. Rose is romping with them. 
Mrs. Barkley, sitting with her back to the glass 
doors, cannot see zvhat is going on outside.) 

Maria. I haven’t mentioned it yet to Rose. 
There’s no need of crossing the bridge till you come 
to it. (Turning toward the fire) You really think 
that Ezra cares for Rose? 

Mrs. Barkley. (Rising and approaching Maria) 
Between you and me and the post, I think he’s mak- 



22 


MISS MARIA 


mg up his mind to offer himself. If she would only 
give him a little encouragement! She’s a good, 
capable girl, level-headed. She’s got just about as 
much religion as he likes, I mean, she isn’t running 
to church all the time when she ought to be staying 
at home looking after things. Really, if he had 
a little encouragement- 

(Rose, running up to r. door and opening it, calls 
back to the children, who rush in and are pushed 
gently out and scamper off, l.) 

Rose. Hurry up, girlies! the first one to reach the 
back door can have the big cookie I’ve left on the 
kitchen table. ( Comes in breathlessly, throws off 
her sacque and hat) 

Mrs. Barkley. You seem to be fond of the 
children, Rose. 

Rose. They don’t take after their father a bit. 

Mrs. Barkley. (Before the tip-mirror on table, 
tying her bonnet-strings) Well, I must run along. 
I might as well stop for the slipper-bag on my way 
home. You can do up the pie plate with it. I 
guess it will soon be empty with seven mouths to 
fill. 

Maria. I’ll have them all ready for you. ( Fol- 
lowing her to the door) I’m so glad you came. 
You are such a comfort to me. ( They embrace) 

Mrs. Barkley. (Stepping outside r. door and 
gathering up her skirts) Good gracious, Maria, 
you ought to see your tulip-beds ! 

Maria. What’s the matter? I just put in the 
bulbs this morning. 

Mrs. Barkley. (Going off l.) It’s a pretty 
mess! Those young ones have been trampling all 
over them. (She passes behind windows from r. to 

L.) 

Maria. (Shuts the door quietly and goes to look 



MISS MARIA 


23 


out windows with Rose, then sits in the arm-chair 
near the fire into which she gazes dreamily j That 
won’t hurt the flowers. 

Rose. I predict they will blossom before the first 
oil-can dividend is paid. 

Maria. And when it is paid, we’ll plant crocuses 
of many dainty colors all over the lawn. 

Rose. ( Dropping on her knees beside Maria at 
l.) Cousin Maria, what would you do if—if the 
oil-can exploded? 

Maria. ( Seriously ) Oh, it is to be very strong. 

Rose. I meant if it failed, dear. 

Maria. Charles says it can’t fail. He says it E 
absolutely sure. 

Rose. But if—if? 

Maria. Nonsense, my darling! Move back a 
little; it’s bad for your complexion to scorch your 
cheeks. When I was young we were never allowed 
to come nearer the fire than the outside edge of the 
hearth-rug. 

Rose. ( Rising ) Is that the reason your com¬ 
plexion is so pretty? 

Maria. You little flatterer! Mr. Ezra Barkley 
once paid me a compliment on my color. He was 
remarking on the number of tons of roses used every 
year, and then he brought in something about my 
cheeks in a very polite way. 

Rose. ( Center back . Teasing her) Oh, Cousin 
Maria ! When is it to be ? 

Maria. Fie, fie ! At Miss Brace’s, Rose, we were 
told that jests upon the affections were indelicate; 
not that you meant it so, of course. 

Rose. ( Archly ) The question is, what does 
Mr. Ezra mean. I shall certainly ask him his in¬ 
tentions. 

Maria. ( Alarmed ) My dear! Miss Brace 
used to say that any allusions to matters of the 
heart were exceedingly unladylike. He looks upon 


24 


MISS MARIA 


me as an old friend of the family. (Sighs) You’ll 
be likely to learn his intentions from his own lips 
before long. 

Rose. What do you mean? 

Maria. What would you say to him as a suitor, 
Rose ? 

Rose. I wouldn’t think of it for a second. Who 
put such an idea into your head ? ( Goes up to table) 

Maria. He has been most attentive lately. He 
came to call this afternoon. 

Rose. ( Facing down) Yes, with his sister, on 
the way to his office. Did she say anything about 
it? 

Maria. I don’t like to repeat what people say. 
If you wouldn’t make quite so much fun of him, he 
would be less timid. No one is so kind as he, and 
I only wish I knew half as much. 

Rose. (Going to Miss Maria) I believe you 
two have been talking it over. (Coaxing her) 
Come now, what did she say? 

Maria. She says all he needs is a little encourage¬ 
ment. 

Rose. (Going down to center) He’ll never get 
it from me. Of course, he’s a dear old thing, but—- 
(Looking reproachfully at Maria) I believe you 
want to get rid of me. 

Maria. (Rising) My darling! I don’t know 
how I could ever get along without you. Why, 
here’s Charles! 

(Charles, passing the wall, comes up r. door and 
enters, holding up a telegram.) 

Rose. Did you get good news? (She makes sure 
r. door is closed after him) 

Charles. (Center) Not quite what I expected. 
The amount of alloy in the metal of which we made 
the oil-cans has been slightly miscalculated, so we 


MISS MARIA 


25 


cannot sell at the low price we reckoned. How¬ 
ever, we might reduce the cost in time. This re¬ 
gards the infringement on our patent. {He hands 
the telegram to Maria r. of c. She reads it and 
looks frightened) 

Maria. “ Oil-can law-suit decided against us. 
Letter on way. Shall we appeal?” Well? 

Charles. Possibly, possibly-—but we must leave 
no stone unturned—possibly a little more money 
might set the thing on its feet. 

Maria. ( Tremulously ) But I haven’t any more. 
{Drops telegram to floor) 

Charles. {Shaking his head) Then we must 
submit to the decrees of an inscrutable Providence. 
(Maria gives a suppressed sob, feels in her pocket, 
and not finding a handkerchief, takes the slipper- 
bag from the back of the chair to wipe her eyes) 
You must not give way. Remember, “ Affliction 
endureth but for a season.” 

Maria. {Restraining her emotion) You are 
such an example to me, Charles. 

{During the foregoing Rose has been standing near 
the fireplace clinching her hands, her features 
rigid. She comes forward swiftly, puts her 
arms about Maria, draws Maria’s head to 
her shoulder, and then turns furiously on 
Charles. Rose and Maria r. of c.) 

Rose. Cry, if you want to, you poor thing! 
Charles, how can you be so heartless, you who in¬ 
fluenced her to put nearly every cent she owned into 
your enterprise? 

Maria. {Bobbing up her head. Tearfully ) 
Charles put in all his time. 

Rose. {To Charles, putting Maria’s head 
down again) I should think you would be ashamed 
of yourself. We owe everything to her. 


2 6 


MISS MARIA 


Charles. I find it very sweet to owe everything 
to Auntie. Where one loves, one can accept. 

Rose. You must love a good deal. 

Charles. I do. And just let me say, Rose, it is 
the little nature that is afraid of an obligation. I 
cannot hold myself responsible for the outcome of 
this project. I did not urge her to invest. You 
remember that I distinctly told you, Aunt Maria, 
that I considered your business judgment as good 
as mine. 

Maria. (Freeing herself from Rose) That’s 
quite true, Charles. You are not a bit to blame. 
Only what are we going to do ? What on earth are 
we all going to live on ? 

Charles. My dear Aunt Maria, you always 
taught me that the Lord will provide. You re¬ 
member how the Apostle says, (Rose goes back to 
fireplace, disgusted) “ We are troubled on every 
side, yet not distressed; we are perplexed, but not 
in despair.” ( Feeling for circular in his pocket with 
a doubtful glance at Rose) Something will turn 
up. 

Maria. Yes, I can find something to do. 

Charles. I’ll tell you what you might do. (Ap¬ 
proaches Maria) You might mortgage the house 
and invest the money; then you could live on the 
interest. 

Maria. I don’t quite like the idea of a mortgage 
over my head. 

Charles. But if you get a good rate of interest, 
you could pay it of¥ in time. 

Maria. Maybe—I don’t know- 

Charles. A splendid company has just been 
organized for the sale of spring-water, the Texas 
Table Temperance Company, known as the Three 
T’s. The Secretary of the Universal Oil-Can Com¬ 
pany is the President, first-class man, I know him. 



MISS MARIA 27 

I have a circular in my pocket. (Produces it) 
They’ll pay ten per cent dividends at once. 

Maria. But mightn’t there be a little risk, dear 
Charles? Not that I don’t trust your judgment 
absolutely. 

Charles. This speaks for itself. ( Reading, 
leaning against table, Miss Maria behind table) 
“ One may easily ascertain the large sums of money 
made from mineral waters and to what extent thev 
are sold; they are used extensively, not only in 
hotels but in private houses as well.” Umph! 
{Turning page) “Magnitude! The prosperity of 
any corporation depends on the commodity dealt 
in, and the largest dividend-paying companies trade 
in staple goods, namely: sugar, oil, beef, coal, light, 
heat, and zvater!” 

Maria. That reads well. 

(Rose starts.) 

Charles. {Continuing to read) “ Whereas, 
most companies have large funds tied up in patent 
rights, franchises and the like, which too often prove 
to be of unsettled value, this ”- 

Rose. {Bursting in) I can’t stand this. Cousin 
Maria shall not mortgage the house where she has 
lived all her life, not if I can help it. Oh, if I were 
a man! 

Charles. Lucky you are not! You are so hot¬ 
headed you would murder someone. Control your¬ 
self. 

Rose. Don’t talk that way to me. I feel as if 
I could murder you. You have pulled the wool 
over Cousin Maria’s eyes long enough; you have 
fleeced her of her inheritance, and now you are try¬ 
ing to swindle her out of her home where she would 
spend her old age in kind deeds and gentle thoughts. 



28 


MISS MARIA 


Shame on you, to treat her in such a scandalous 
manner, you penniless good-for-nothing! 

Charles. I’m not the only poor one she has put 
up with. 

Rose. She has lost her money through you. I 
don’t know what she may have lost through me- 

Marta. ( Plaintively ) Rose! 

Rose. ( Continuing ) But whatever it is, I’d 
give my life to make it up to her. (Rose, angry, 
goes up to window) 

Charles. (Walks over to the table, baffled, look¬ 
ing down as if planning his next move) A most 
high-minded sentiment. 

(Maria follows Rose.) 

Maria. ( To Rose, pleadingly) You know, my 
dear, you never did take to Charles. 

Charles. (Suddenly notices pie) What a nice- 
looking pie, Auntie. 

Maria. (Comes dozvn, giving her eyes one or 
tzvo little dabs with her handkerchief) Yes, it’s 
mince. Mrs. Barkley brought it. I must take it 
out of the plate. ( Lifts it from the table and starts 
toward door l. Glances back with trepidation at 
Rose and Charles) Aren’t you hungry, Charles? 

Charles. Why, yes, to tell the truth, I am. I 
was traveling most of the morning, so all I had for 
lunch was a sandwich and a cup of coffee. 

Rose. (Up-stage, facing down) We didn’t have 
much more. 

Maria. Come right out in the dining-room, 
Charles. The children are round the table, paint¬ 
ing. (Charles opens the door l. deferentially for 
Maria and looks back at Rose spitefully, as they go 
out. Rose throws up her arms in f ury, stands tense, 
desperate, for an instant, then dashes over to the 
secretary. She semes the oil-can circulars which 




MISS MARIA 


29 


litter the floor, crushes them into hard balls, and 
crossing swiftly to the fireplace, hurls them into the 
flames, exclaiming in a quivering voice, “ These 
miserable oil-can circulars.” Returns to the secre¬ 
tary, snatches another handful from the drawer, as 
Miss Maria re-enters l.) My child, what are you 
doing ? 

o 

Rose. (Up center. Frantically continuing the 
action ) Turning fraud into fuel! It’s all the good 
they’ll ever do. 

Maria. (Crossing to table) You mustn’t be too 
hard on Charles, dear. See what a beautiful ex¬ 
ample of submission he gives us. You must remem¬ 
ber that he has lost his all. What should I do if 
he were rebellious or did not put his trust in his 
Heavenly Father? 

Rose. (Beside herself) I don’t know. (Coming 
dozvn) I only know that I can’t be dependent on 
you any longer. I’m going to Mercer to get a place 
in a shop. (She puts on her hat before mirror and 
begins to pull on her jacket) 

Maria, (l. of table) You—in a shop! Rose, I 
couldn’t bear it. You wouldn’t leave me? 

Rose. Charles can fill my place. 

Maria. (Trying to restrain her from putting on 
her jacket) Charles won’t be here always. I need 
you. Rose. 

Rose. You can get on without me. There’s noth¬ 
ing in Old Chester for a girl to do. 

Maria. Rose, I can’t allow you to go into a shop. 
I cannot permit you to expose yourself to the lack 
of courtesy you would encounter. Besides, there 
is something for you to do right here, Rose. 

Rose. What, I’d like to know? 

Maria. I have a little plan, Rose, for both of us. 
I can’t get along without you. (She takes off 
Rose’s hat) Come and sit down (She fetches foot- 


MISS MARIA 


30 

stool from l. and places it at l. of chair) and we 
will talk it over. (Maria sits l. of table) 

Rose. ( Partly soothed down) Well? ( Sits on 
foot-stool) 

Maria. I’m going to open an Academy; the 
young ladies may board, or return to their homes 
at night, as their parents prefer. I shall have to de¬ 
pend on you for a great deal, you are so much 
fresher in some things. For instance, Rose, I’m 
ashamed to say I’ve forgotten the length of the 
Mississippi River. 

Rose. (Subdued) I’m afraid I’d have to look 
it up, too. 

Maria. We will begin to-morrow to brush up our 
accomplishments. Don’t you want to see if you can 
carry an atlas on your head, Rose? Just take a 
few turns round the room. (Takes book from 
table) I tried it and it didn’t fall off. 

Rose. (Wearily) I’ll try it to-morrow. 

Maria. You look tired, dear. I fear I spoke 
harshly; I didn’t mean to scold you. (She pats 
Rose’s hand. Rose drops her head in Miss Maria’s 
lap) 

Rose. Oh, I feel so wicked! I say such dread¬ 
ful things, and yet I mean them all; I can’t take 
back a single one. Can you forgive me? 

Maria. Come, come, it will be all right. 

Rose. I wish I were a quarter as good as you are. 
Charles means well, I suppose, but it isn’t enough 
in this world just to mean well. How could he let 
you suffer? 

Maria. There, there, you mustn’t talk that way. 
Oh, I don’t mean to scold you again. I’m always 
having to watch my temper. Do try to cheer up, 
dear. 


(It$begins to grow dusk.) 


MISS MARIA 


3 l 


Rose. ( Raises her head) It seems so hard! 

Maria. Of course, it’s unfortunate, but it isn’t 
the worst thing in the world. Suppose some of you 
were dangerously sick. Would I think of mere 
money then? No, indeed! 

Rose. We’ll get along somehow. 

Maria. We’ll get along nicely. When the chil¬ 
dren are gone to bed, we’ll discuss the Academy. 
We must try to be pleasant at supper for their sakes. 

Rose. {Bows her head) I’ll try. 

Maria. And we must not let Charles think we 
take it too—too seriously. He would feel so hurt! 

Rose. Charles— (As Rose indignantly throws 
back her head, Miss Maria places her hand gently 
over the girl's mouth) 

Maria. It is almost twilight, my dear. You re¬ 
member we are told not to let the sun go down on 
our anger. 

Rose. ( Bozos her head) Let’s talk about some¬ 
thing else. (Musing) Do you suppose Mr. Ezra 
could give us points on educating young girls? 

Maria. He doesn’t know about it yet. 

Rose. You said that Mrs. Barkley said that he— 
er—liked me ? 

Maria. (Starts. Rose sitting at her feet does 
not see her agitation) Yes, she said something of 
that kind. You seemed to—treat it as a jest. 

Rose. I see the gravity of it now. (Embracing 
Miss Maria) Whenever I marry, dearest, I want 
you to promise to make your home with me. 

Maria. That wouldn’t do. Rose. 

Rose. You should be willing to stand by me 
when I am agreeing to stay by you. (Miss Maria 
shakes her head) Promise, now. 

Maria. Very well. 

Rose. You think all Mr. Ezra needs is a little 
encouragement ? 

Maria. That is what Matty said. 


32 


MISS MARIA 


Rose. ( Rising) If that is all he wants/it seems 
a shame he shouldn’t get it. I’ll tell you, Cousin 
Maria, what we will do. ( Behind Maria’s chair) 
If Mr. Ezra goes to you first, you give him a wee 
bit; and if he comes to me, I’ll give him just a 
mite, and we’ll see what happens. 

Maria. ( Rising ) Rose, Rose, you shouldn’t 
joke about it. You wouldn’t marry him unless you 
really loved him, would you, dear? 

Rose. Tut, tut! What would Miss Brace say? 
How about allusions to matters of the heart? 

' Maria. I beg your pardon. Never mind me, 
dear. (Kisses her) I must get supper for those 
precious children. They are all alone. Charles 
went to the post-office for the last mail, to see if the 
letter comes which was mentioned in the telegram. 

Rose. I’ll come and help you in a minute. 

(Exit Maria l. Rose puts stool back in place l. 
stage. Mr. Ezra passes and lifts his hat on 
seeing Rose. " Encouragement! ” she exclaims, 
and smooths down her hair before the tip- 
mirror. Ezra rings. Rose opens the door for 
Ezra, who enters.) 

Ezra. (Ceremoniously) I trust J have not come 
at an inopportune hour. 

Rose. (Nervously trying to be agreeable) You 
are always welcome, Mr. Ezra, Mr. Barkley. 
Won’t you take ofif your hat? (Ezra stares) I 
mean, your coat? 

Ezra. (Removing his coat and placing it on 
chair up) These fall evenings have a penetrating 
chill in the atmosphere. (Pause, as Rose shoves a 
chair toward him, and, after glancing hesitatingly 
at door l., resolutely seats herself r. of table) 

Ezra. May I see Miss Maria? 

Rose. She has just gone to get supper for the 
children. She will be at leisure presently. 


MISS MARIA 


33 


Ezra. I wish to speak to her on a matter of 
great importance. ( Sitting l. of table) It was my 
intention to address her before I saw you, but pos¬ 
sibly Fate has thus made a more auspicious arrange¬ 
ment. 

Rose. Then you will discuss the subject with 
me first? 

Ezra. (Rose moves her chair nearer to Ezra. 
He moves away) Mrs. Barkley stopped for a 
minute at my office, and informed me that Miss 
Maria feels herself called upon to open a school. 
I glean from that that her circumstances are, what 
you might term, straitened. I regret inexpres¬ 
sibly that ladies should be so situated, as I fear that 
instructing youth may not be the most congenial 
occupation for one of your lively temperament. 

Rose. (Nervously) I appreciate your kind in¬ 
terest. 

Ezra. It is deplorable that through some in¬ 
advertence on the part of Charles ( Glancing warily 
at door l. and lowering his voice) —he is not in, is 
he ? 

Rose. No. 

Ezra. ( Raising his voice) —through his inad¬ 
vertence that Miss Maria’s income is in jeopardy. 
He has received good news ? 

Rose. The worst possible; the oil-can has ex¬ 
ploded and all the oil has evaporated. 

Ezra. ( Looking about in dismay) Most dis¬ 
tressing, most distressing! Then I must speak to 
Miss Maria at once. 

Rose. (Rising and showing her nervousness . 
Going behind table) There’s no hurry. She won’t 
evaporate. (Ezra crosses r. in front of table, fol- 
lozving Rose; she dodges, to his confusion) 

Ezra. Quite so. 1 am solicitous to gain your con¬ 
sent, but I wanted Miss Maria’s sanction first; no—I 


34 


MISS MARIA 


mean your sanction and Miss Maria’s consent. I— 
I intended to advise with you later. 

Rose. ( Behind tabic) That old notion of gaining 
permission to pay one’s addresses to a woman is 
falling out of fashion. It’s trying enough to ask 
for the parental blessing. 

Ezra. I disagree with you, Miss Rose. The old 
custom should be maintained. But in this case, 
where there is no parent to consult- 

Rose. Quite so, as you say. When two people 
stand face to face, and know precisely what they 
want ( Turns her back on him in her agitation and 
goes down center) what’s the use of beating about 
the bush? 

Ezra. ( Behind Rose at r.) Quite so. 

Rose. ( Half tearfully) You realize then, that 
Cousin Maria’s welfare is indispensable to my happi¬ 
ness ? 

Ezra. I realize clearly that your happiness is 
essentia] to Miss Maria’s peace of mind. 

Rose. You don’t mean that you, you too, are 
sacrificing your freedom that Cousin Maria may be 
free from distress? 

Ezra. My dear young lady, I cannot tolerate such 
an assumption concerning the fair sex. 

Rose. ( Facing him appealingly) You do under¬ 
stand, don’t you, that Cousin "Maria couldn’t be 
happy away from this old home, and that I want 
her to live here always? 

Ezra. I am agreeable as far as I am concerned. 
It rests with Miss Maria. If she gives her con¬ 
sent— 

Rose. Her consent! Why do you keep harping 
on her consent? I thought you had decided to ask 
for mine, first! 

Ezra. ( Amazed) My dear child! I didn’t sup¬ 
pose you were in earnest. Matilda says you never 




MISS MARIA 


35 

are. May I ask yaur consent, then, to my proposal 
for the hand of your cousin, Miss Maria? 

Rose. ( Astounded ) My consent! (Ezra nods) 
To Miss Maria! Really? Oh, you dear man! 
(She darts toward him to embrace him) Oh, you 
dear! 

Ezra. ( Mildly, putting her off, much embar¬ 
rassed) . I hoped for your approval. 

Rose. Of course, of course. 

Ezra. If you can furnish me any enlightenment 
as to Miss Maria’s opinions- 

Rose. Don’t let her discourage you. 

Ezra. I trust you may use your influence in my 
behalf. It was that I wished to solicit. 

Rose. I’m ready to say ( Business, Benediction) 
“ Bless you, my children,” right away. (Ezra goes 
to table. Rose goes up. Aside) Oh, what an 
escape! 

Ezra. Perhaps you had better inform her I am 
here. 

Rose. ( Hysterically) Of course, of course ; oh, 
I’m so happy! (Rose dances off left, singing “ Bin 
the last Rose of summer, left blooming alone.") 

Ezra. (Walking between table and fireplace , 
raises his hand to his throat) My respiration is 
hastened when it should be particularly regular. 
I should arrange the interview to some extent so as 
not to startle Miss Maria. (Draws out his zvatch 
to guide his calculation) Weather first, allow a 
minute. (He catches sight of himself in the tip- 
mirror and stands before it watching his expres¬ 
sion ) “ I trust your occupations do not keep you 

indoors too much! ”—throw in some data as to ex¬ 
ercise. Three minutes, including her reply. Then 
I will try to bring up financial matters and the 
hardships of life (Gesture) gliding naturally into 
facts about marriage, five minutes, and so remark 
that I should be pleased to smooth the path of life 



MISS MARIA 


36 

for her feet. (Consults zvatch as he puts it in his 
pocket) About ten minutes. Quite so. 

(Miss Maria enters l. carrying the pie plate and a 
piece of brown paper and string. Takes the 
slipper-hag off the table in passing and ap¬ 
proaches Ezra.) 

Maria. (Smiling) In case Matty shouldn’t re¬ 
member to call for these, I’ll do them up so you can 
take them when you go. (Begins to tie up the 
parcel, awkzvardly) 

Ezra. These November days are very agreeable. 

Maria. Yes. Don’t you want to put your finger 
on this knot? 

Ezra. (Assisting her) I trust your occupations 
do not keep you indoors too much. 

Maria. (They both fumble over the package) 
This string slips so. Rose said you were waiting 
to speak to me on a matter of importance. (Pause) 

Ezra. (Bracing himself for the ordeal) Ex¬ 
ercise is indispensable to bodily vigor. In civilized 
communities, especially, where men lead sedentary 
lives- 

Maria, (l. of table) Rut you always walk to 
your office twice a day, Mr. Ezra; I’ve seen you 
pass for years, as regularly as the stage-coach. 
(Short pause) Rose seemed very happy. (She 
puts the package on the secretary) 

Ezra. Quite so. Financial matters do not weigh 
upon the young. It is our privilege to so veneer the 
sordid side of life that they, that they, in short, that 
they may be perfectly happy. You catch my mean- 
itig? 

(They sit opposite each other at the table. Ezra 

at r., Maria at l.) 

Maria. Rose’s happiness is my constant prayer. 



MISS MARIA 


37 

I hope to open an Academy, but I dread the repres¬ 
sion she will experience. 

Ezra. Now, is it not possible to make some other 
arrangement? In fact, I have in mind a plan of 
which I came to speak this afternoon. {He looks at 
his watch, holding it beneath the edge of the table) 

Marta. If you mean my going to live with Matty, 
which she spoke to me about, it is the kindest thing 
in the world, but I can’t do it. I am going to work. 
As long as Rose is provided for, I can get along. 

Ezra. I admire your courage and your, deter¬ 
mination to open an institution. ( Wiping his glasses 
and squinting through them) Most people regard 
marriage as one of the oldest of institutions, but the 
fact is the ceremony was not solemnized in church 
as a religious rite till the time of Pope Innocent III, 
A. D. H98, and it was not considered a sacrament 
till 1442. {Glances at his watch) 

Maria. If I only had some of your learning, 
Mr. Ezra, my Academy would surely be a success. 

Ezra. The plan to which I referred had nothing 
to do with Matilda’s suggestion. {Leaning toward 
her) It concerns both you and Rose. 

Marta. (Shrinking from the idea that he is going 
to propose for Rose) Ah! 

Ezra. It seems to combine my sister’s wishes with 
greater, as I may say, convenience, and—and—suit¬ 
ability. Miss Maria, you may not be aware that the 
average life of the married man exceeds that of the 
bachelor by some years, and it, I. my sister, {Glances 
at watch, pockets it, and continues hastily) I have 
given the subject much thought, and I am convinced 
my plan will be a desirable arrangement. 

Maria. {Sits very straight and squeezes her 
hands together tightly) I know you have Rose’s 
interest at heart. 

Ezra. {With a reminiscent smile) I venture to 


3 « 


MISS MARIA 



hope that Miss Rose will not object to it if you do 
not. 

Maria. Rose is very young. I’m sure I don’t 
know her—her sentiments. 

Ezra. Miss Maria, I have long felt the deepest 
esteem for you, and your noble attitude in this un¬ 
fortunate crisis in your affairs has added admira¬ 
tion to esteem. Miss Maria, the exigencies of the 
present distressing moment must be my excuse for 
so abrupt a statement of my, ah, as you might sav, 
regard. ( Rising) Miss Maria, will you do me the 
honor to accept my hand? (Miss Maria stares at 
him in astonishment. Ezra goes behind table) 
You see it will be to me an agreeable solution of this 
somewhat difficult situation. ( Behind her chair) I 
hope that your feelings toward me are not unkind. 

Maria. I don’t understand. 

Ezra. ( Walking to l.) I should have been glad 
to lead up to my request with the proper decorum 
( Stopping at extreme l.) but I assure you of the 
warmth of my—my sentiments. (Miss Maria 
covers her eyes zvith her hand. Ezra approaching 
her solicitously) I trust I have not offended you 
by the—as you might say—bluntness of my address? 

Maria. No, no, not offended, but surprised, very 
much surprised. ( Indignantly. Looking up at him) 
Why didn’t you tell me at once? You couldn’t ex¬ 
pect me to foresee it after all these years. 

Ezra. ( Humbly) I never dared refer to such 
a delicate matter before, Miss Maria. You have 
always had so much to occupy you, that I feared 
a husband would be in your way. 

Maria. ( Softens) I don’t know what to say. 
I never thought of such a thing, at least, not—not 
lately. (She bows her head on the table. Ezra 
leans over her) 

Ezra. I entreat you, Miss Maria. 

Maria. (Looking up at him) Ezra, you do 


MISS MARIA 


39 

care for me a little? (Rises) It isn’t just out of 
pity ? 

Ezra. Why, I— (Stops, and looks about help¬ 
lessly, then continues, until a break in his voice) I 
have never cared for anyone else. (He kisses her 
hand and retains it. Maria gives a blissful sigh) 
Maria. Matty! Perhaps Matty would have 

wished—something else ? 

Ezra. (With straightforward honesty) Miss 
Rose can live with us; that will be a gratification to 
Matilda, beyond a doubt. 

Maria. I’m afraid, Mr. Ezra, I can not consider 
it—unless- 

(Lights up as Rose enters l. with lighted lamp, 
passing behind them roguishly, and places it on 
table. Maria draws her hand away from 
Ezra.) 

Rose. (Lighting candles on secretary) I hope 
you don’t require any more light on the subject, 
Mr. Ezra. (Audaciously, as Ezra follows her up) 
Did she give you any encouragement ? 

Maria. ( Shocked ) Rose! (Maria is left alone, 

L.) 

Ezra. (To Rose) I cannot say. 

(Rose answers Ezra in pantomime during Maria’s 

exclamations.) 

Maria. (Glancing across at Rose. To herself) 
Dear me! 

Ezra. (To Rose) I’m in perplexity. 

Maria. If she only knew! 

Ezra. (To Rose) You would be more urgent? 
Maria. She’ll be so surprised! 

Ezra. (To Rose) I feel emboldened —(Goes 
toward Maria) 



40 


MISS MARIA 


Maria. ( Breaking in and going up to center ) 
I have something to tell you after supper, Rose. 

Rose. I want to know now. ( Folding away old 
dress in secretary drawer) I’d like to make a pretty 
bridesmaid’s gown. 

Ezra. (r. of c. up) I recommend you to begin 
it at once. 

(Rose flings her arms around Miss Maria, l., and 
kisses her as Mrs. Barkley rings at r. door. 
Ezra opens door and goes behind table r. of c.) 

Mrs. Barkley. ( Entering and crossing front) 
Ezra ! you here ? I seem to be interrupting an affect¬ 
ing scene! Ezra, have you spoken? Rose, I’m 
so glad! . 

Rose. (Demurely) Yes’m; so am I. ( Repuls¬ 
ing Mrs. Barkley’s embrace) The kisses go to 
Cousin Maria. 

Mrs. Barkley. What do you mean? ( Seeing 
Ezra up center urging Maria tozvard her) Well! 
upon my word! (Pause) You don’t mean to tell 
me that he and Maria have come to an understand- 
ing? 

Ezra. I trust you will favor this arrangement. 

Mrs. Barkley. My dear Maria. ( Hugs and 
kisses her. Maria tries in vain to ward her off) 
Why didn’t I think of it myself? I was a perfect 
fool! 

Maria. (Center) Don’t go so fast, my dear 
friend. I haven’t had a chance to say a word. I’m 
just getting my senses back. We must think of the 
future; not one of us has considered the prospect 
for the children. 

Ezra. (r. Puzzled) The children! 

Maria. And Charles too! What’s going to be¬ 
come of all of them, I’d like to know. 

Ezra. The least judicial mind cannot controvert 


MISS MARIA 


4* 


the statement that you have acquitted yourself with 
exemplary patience and fidelity of your duty toward 
Charles and Charles’s growing family, and your 
brother should not have held you responsible to that 
extent thirty years ago. You cannot revere too 
highly the greatest of the virtues, but you might ex¬ 
tend your charity a little beyond the bounds of your 
own home. Consider how long I have waited, Miss 
Maria! 

Marta. I must try to arrange something for 
Charles’s future. 

(Charles enters r. door with letter. He bows 
stiffly to them all, crosses front of table where 
he leaves his hat and gloves, and speaks with 
irritation at first.) 

Charles. Hope you have not finished supper. 
The mail was late. Inconveniences are as frequent 
in a town of this size as worms on a brick sidewalk 
in a spring rain. You run across them at every 
step. 

Mrs. Barkley. I don’t see why you stay here so 
much if you dislike it so heartily. 

Charles. I am happy to say that I shall not be 
here much more. This is too narrow a field for a 
man of ability. 


(Ezra straightens up.) 

Ezra. H’m! 

Cliarles. Where I am going the outlet is bound¬ 
less for one’s energies. ( Center) 

Maria. You are going away? ( They gather 
round table. Charles crosses to l. He speaks 
condescendingly to Maria) I have just had a most 
flattering offer from the secretary of the Three T’s 
Company. 


42 MISS MARIA 

Mrs. Barkley. Three Teas Company? (Mach 
pleased) In Japan? 

Charles. No; in Texas. The Texas lable 
Temperance Company. 

Mrs. Barkley. ( Disappointed ) Oh! 

Charles. It is to be run on a philanthropic basis 
so as to interest the temperance societies. If we 
can rely on their support, we should start with a 
powerful backing. They have offered me the charge 
of the bottling works, and incidentally wish me to 
preach to the poor, neglected negroes in the neigh¬ 
borhood. 

Mrs. Barkley. Oh, Lord ! 

Charles. Yes, I never doubted but what the 
Lord would provide. 

Rose. You intend to go? And to take the chil¬ 
dren ? 

Charles. Yes, I am told the climate is most 
desirable. The babies can live outdoors all the time. 

Maria. I have news for you, too, Charles. Mr. 
Barkley has asked me to become his wife. 

Charles. Eh? Oh, that’s very nice, isn’t it? I 
congratulate you, I’m sure. I said the Lord would 
provide. (Ezra shakes hands coldly, Mrs. Barkley 
turns her back, Miss Maria regards him piteously) 
Guess I’ll go and tell the children of our departure. 

(There is silence until he has closed the l. door after 

him.) 

Mrs. Barkley. Good riddance! (Mrs. Barkley 
and Rose give comical sighs of relief, then seeing 
that Ezra and Maria are absorbed in each other, 
Mrs. Barkley sniffs, and picks up package from the 
secretary) Is this the pie plate? I guess I won’t 
take it home, seeing it’s all in the family. (She 
glances happily at Ezra, then suddenly bursts into 
tears on Rose’s shoulder. Rose leads her gently 


MISS MARIA 


41 

azvay to the windows. Ezra and Maria center x 
Ezra r., Maria l.) 

Ezra. If there is no obstacle in the way, Miss 
Maria, I should be pleased to receive the congratula¬ 
tions of Old Chester. 

Maria. (Glancing up at him with uncon¬ 
scious coquetry) Don’t you think it is time to stop 
calling me Miss {Pause) Maria? 


(Ezra holds out his arms and draws her to him as 

the curtain falls.) 























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